weekly r.e.p.o.r.t. c.a.r.d. #49

dating standards in 2026, healthy snacks, and fashion when it's too hot to think

Happy Monday! It was truly the perfect weekend here in NYC—the temperamental spring weather has finally become summer. So people are out and about and the city feels alive.

So alive, in fact, that standing on lines seems to be the new NYC hobby (perhaps even trumping needlepoint and padel). My friend and I went to five coffee shops on the Upper East Side on Saturday AM. All of them had a line of over thirty minutes…for food that is decidedly mediocre. If I’m spending time in line, it better be worth it.

Treats worth waiting for. If you haven’t yet been to Birley Bakery on the UES, wow. Not pictured, but their bacon swirl roll is otherworldly. Gobbled it up too quickly to get a pic.

Last week’s r.e.p.o.r.t. c.a.r.d. is here. This week, a pre-ordered book worth the hype, better-for-you snacks that actually deliver, and some fun spring fashion.

Reading (book): I never pre-order books. I’m an incredibly decisive reader (if it doesn’t hook me within fifty pages, I proudly drop it and move onto another title). I also like having all of the data to decide whether a book is for me—including thousands of reviews. So buying this book was a little risky (in my mind).

But I knew deep down that I’d be an instant fan…and I was. A twisty-turny thriller about a Harvard Law school reject who starts stalking her classmate in retaliation, it’s also a searing take on the Ivy League. Whipped through it!

What else I’ve been reading lately: this fast read about rich people doing bad things and this memoir by a public figure who spills it all about her husband and their very messy divorce.

Reading (article): I’ll admit that I’ve never seen a full episode of COUPLES THERAPY. But I’ve watched enough TikTok clips of the show to qualify as a major superfan. I lap up any content about the show—and loved this WSJ feature on the show’s star therapist Orna Guralnik. Sharing via gift link so everyone can read.

Also, I have many thoughts about 2026 dating culture. If you are single today, I truly salute you. It’s rough out there—I talk about this topic often with my friend Anna Morgenstern, a professional matchmaker. (If you’re single, join her database—it’s free!) I particularly enjoyed this Atlantic piece about the phenomenon of dating as equals. There’s a big disconnect happening right now—women are making more and more money than ever, but their expectations are stuck in the 1950s. Why?

On CAREER CONFESSIONALS this week, a drug dealer turned $18M business owner. Really. A college dropout, Peter became a multi-million dollar entrepreneur by finding whitespace in the market and relentlessly going for it. A masterclass in grit and how not sticking with the script works out if you’re uber-persistent.

Eating: I’m all for better-for-you snacks…but not if they taste like dust. I’ve recently ventured into the world of date-sweetened chocolate, and have had a few misses along the way. Many brands are straight-up gross. But these two pass my sniff test!

These hazelnut-stuffed chocolate hearts are supremely good. Lower sugar than “traditional” chocolate…but you’d never know. They’ve become my favorite late-night snack to cap off dinner.

I also love these date-sweetened chocolate chips for baking. I’ve tried a few brands, but these are far and away my favorite!

Also on the lower sugar front—this zero-sugar coffee / matcha sweetener that tastes just like the real thing. No sugar alcohols (so no stomach angst). And for more lower-sugar hacks, here’s the download on the sugar cleanse I did earlier this year.

Playing: When it’s too hot to think, futzing with a zipper is the last thing you need. Enter the pull-on dress. Easy, stylish, and a done-for-you outfit in two seconds—so you can focus on your hair not melting in the heat. All under $200!

1. Love this nautical-esque dress! I’d funk it up a bit with these statement earrings.

2. A faux wrap dress is always a good idea. Looks like you spent hours nailing the tie, but all you did was slip it on.

3. The LBD gets a lot of attention, but the LWD equally deserves the spotlight. This dress isn’t so little, but such a classic.

4. Another fun faux wrap option—this time in a mini! So many colorways. If you really want to be polarizing, opt for these jelly flats (I don’t believe in investing in trends like this, so this pair is perfect).

   1. To round out the look, these pearl earrings hit way higher than their price point, as does this two-tone woven bag.

5. Always a fan of stripes! Pair it with this classic raffia clutch.

6. A dress with pockets—something we’re all chasing! The olive is flattering on all skin tones, and the neck bandana makes it extra chic.

   1. For more well-priced spring picks, check out these funky bags and this roundup of statement jewelry!

Recommending: I’ve literally recommended this ice cream shop to seven people in the last week. And yes, I did recommend a low-sugar dessert option earlier in this newsletter. Such is the nuance of life!

This is a “dirt cup” soft serve sundae—I wish they had 1-900 in NYC!

1-900-ICE CREAM is a small batch ice cream shop specializing in soft serve and hard ice cream with mix-ins. Their ice cream is so good that it makes Ben & Jerry’s taste like the bottom of your shoe. Really.

They’re based in Philadelphia and have two locations (Rittenhouse and Fishtown). I used to go there every single week when I lived in Philly…so much so that the staff started recognizing me. Oops.

I now trek down to Philly every year around Thanksgiving to procure ice cream for my husband’s family. It’s what I’ve brought for Thanksgiving for the past few years, and a riot will break out if I don’t bring it.

When the weather gets hot, I get on my ice cream evangelizing pedestal. If you live in Philly (or have a trip planned!), stop by 1-900 and you won’t be disappointed. 1-900 used to offer national shipping, but they unfortunately stopped last year! So you’ll have to make the trip in-person order to experience the magic.

Admiring: Some things, people, and content I’ve been loving this week:

Some Monday motivation via Tisha:

• OFF-CAMPUS is such an easy, light watch. Is it as good as HEATED RIVALRY? Absolutely not. But it scratches the itch while we wait for season two. It’s been a great background show as I finish my wedding thank you cards.

• Everyone is going wild over these bandana pants, and I understand why. An Alemais look at a fraction of the price. For more bandana-printed fun, I love this monogrammed bandana tote. I paid full price for mine, but you don’t have to (the Etsy version is just as good).

• This detergent brand gets an 10/10 for a witty name and a damn good product. I used it for the first time a few weeks ago and my husband immediately noticed the scent (and loved it). When a guy clocks something laundry-related, something has gone right.

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And finally, Substack Saves—a new section spotlighting the pieces worth your time.

• Lots of creator tea in this Substack via Tough Love by Hannah Wilson. A creator who is re-envisioning her business, she made 7.5x her corporate salary last year…but has only made $13K this year so far. Why? She’s now focusing on financial longevity and building a career that will compensate her for years to come. Read her piece for the full context, but simply posting about yourself doesn’t translate into long-term wealth. There needs to be some meat there!

• Everyone is shocked by Shein’s purported $100M acquisition of Everlane. This take by Shivam Gusain is great—and unpacks the private equity narrative behind it all. Everlane built its business on sustainability, which enabled them to scale massively. But if you look beneath the surface, aligning themselves with a brand like Shein makes a ton of sense from a business POV (but definitely not from a narrative and storytelling POV).

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